Things have been going pretty darn good for me lately. Pretty darn fantastical wonderful stupendical, in fact.
These past few weeks have seen me exercising like a lunatic, falling in love with the gym all over again, and finding any excuse to get outside and move my body (no matter how embarrassing I may look). And all of my little fat cells absolutely hate me for it; which all my little brain cells love me for it.
Just thinking back a few months ago, I remember trying to hide my general unhappiness with being overweight and out of shape. Mostly, I would eat to make myself feel better about being overweight. Yeah, that doesn’t make sense to me either….though it worked fairly well. While I was eating I felt good. While I was eating I could forget about wherever my worries lay. While I was eating I was content.
And then after the eating I was anxious and worried and disappointed and upset and emotional and disappointed and defeated and sad and angry and disappointed. Which would make me eat more. But eventually everybody reaches their food limit, and there were times when I literally could not continue eating. So then what? Well, then I was stuck with those unhappy thoughts and no way of comforting myself. Cue public service announcement on the dangers of relying on chocolate and peanut butter to solve your problems.
But now that I’ve seen the brilliant and divine light of exercise and healthy eating, I’ve come to a stunning realization.
Eating keeps you happy some of the time; fitness keeps you happy all of the time.
Even when I’m not running around at the gym and shoving apples into my mouth, I find myself in a better mood. When walking around campus, I notice that I’m smiling with confidence. I go home at night and instead of wallowing in self-pity, I do a few jumping jacks and call up a friend. Eating better and exercising has enriched almost every aspect of my life (though maybe not the aspect that involves free time).
While there are days that I struggle and times where I know it’d be so much easier to call up Papa Johns and order myself a whole pizza with mushrooms and pineapple, on most every day, I am thrilled to be alive and actively participating in my life.
It was a tough transition. It is still hard. But it is and will always be oh so worth it.